Hello everyone! I just wanted to tell you about a new virtual course that I signed up for called “The Friendship Course.” It was created by an artist whose journey I have followed for several years, Kelly Rae Roberts. I have taken her online courses about painting, creativity and mantras, and her new offering is exactly what I’ve been looking for. It focuses on building and maintaining friendships, particularly in middle age.

I am an introvert, and also quite shy; I have grown to understand those are not the same thing. The two friends I do have are parents of my daughter’s friends, and I have not made an effort to stay in contact with them. I don’t understand why I don’t keep in touch, other than I love my alone time, and it is so much easier to be alone than to be in the company of other people. I guess I have social anxiety that I have never really conquered because I am busy just tackling all the bipolar symptoms.

I decided it is time to cultivate some new friendships. I used to think I was an expressive person, because I am an artist, but I have come to realize that I am pretty guarded when it comes to revealing my feelings for other people. It is hard for me to tell someone how special they are to me; I feel awkward and very vulnerable, a feeling I am not comfortable with at all. Recently I have been in the company of women who have easily expressed positive feelings toward me, and I have meagerly reciprocated. I want to be able to genuinely reveal my feelings in return. That’s the goal I will start with as I venture into the course.